Monday, May 31, 2004
Happy Memorial Day! Here's today's exercise. Try to think of how many vets you know.
Next time that I'll be blogging, I'll be blogging from Oregon. I understand they have the Internet out there as well. I hope it's the same version that I am using.
Next time that I'll be blogging, I'll be blogging from Oregon. I understand they have the Internet out there as well. I hope it's the same version that I am using.
Sunday, May 30, 2004
Okay, I've got something to be ashamed of. How much do you like butter?
We were talking about challenges the other day. I said it was impossible to eat ten crackers in under a minute. It turn out that if you have water you can do it. Shawn did it, but he couldn't do it without water. So if you ever want to win a bet then you know what to do. Sure it seems simple. All you have to do is eat a cracker every six seconds. Try it.
Shawn brought up some thing he read in a magazine. He read that it's impossible to eat a stick of butter. I tell you that magazine lied. Not only did I eat a stick of butter, but I ate one in four minutes.
And now you may be ashamed of me as well. If anybody tries this and beats my time, I'd like to know about it.
That's right folks I'm a butter chomping champ. I'm a true testament to the human spirit. Although, I don't think I want any butter for a while.
(The odd thing is that I had NO side effects.)
We were talking about challenges the other day. I said it was impossible to eat ten crackers in under a minute. It turn out that if you have water you can do it. Shawn did it, but he couldn't do it without water. So if you ever want to win a bet then you know what to do. Sure it seems simple. All you have to do is eat a cracker every six seconds. Try it.
Shawn brought up some thing he read in a magazine. He read that it's impossible to eat a stick of butter. I tell you that magazine lied. Not only did I eat a stick of butter, but I ate one in four minutes.
And now you may be ashamed of me as well. If anybody tries this and beats my time, I'd like to know about it.
That's right folks I'm a butter chomping champ. I'm a true testament to the human spirit. Although, I don't think I want any butter for a while.
(The odd thing is that I had NO side effects.)
Friday, May 28, 2004
So here's the deal. I sold my Southwest stock. It's been down for a third day in a row. I just had a bad feeling about that. It dropped a whole 15 cents a share today.
I bought a hundred shares at 14.98 last Friday. Today, I sold those hundred shares at 15.48. That's a gain of fifty bucks. Now with my twenty bucks in fees, I made thirty bucks. That may not seem like a lot, but that works out to about a 2 percent return. Not bad for a first try at technical analysis. (It doesn't seem stellar, but it's only been a week.)
It's got to be better than the gambling I've been doing. I've just got to remember the number one rule. Use stops.
I was talking to a guy at work today. I think I am going to tell him about technical analysis and let him consider it for himself. I just asked him for three unrelated stocks. I've printed them off and plan to show him the charts. He actually picked three good looking stocks, but they are too expensive for me. At least they are near to good looking, but close only counts in horse shoes and hand grenades.
He told me about when he bout K-Mart stock he was planning on retiring on it. I told him that I had bought some as well. I only bought a hundred shares and the next trading day they declared bankruptcy. (Just after a three day weekend.) The price went from the 1.50 I bought it at to 75 cents in one swoop. I was seriously depressed.
He told me that he bought a thousand shares at sixty cents a piece. Now of course, it didn't stay at sixty cents. It went back up to $1.70 a share. He was planning on retiring on those shares. The thing is that I just wanted to double my money.
I sold out at about 90 cents. He never did. Today, he has a thousand pieces of toilet paper. This is why stops are so important. When you buy a stock you say to yourself, "How much am I willing to lose on this deal?"
If you buy a stock at ten dollars and decide you are only willing to lose ten percent, you set a stop loss order at 9 dollars. Essentially, you tell your broker that if it hits nine dollars, you want out. You may actually get to sell it for 8.50, but at least you are out.
It's human nature to want to be right, but remember, this is money people. Sometimes it's okay to be wrong. Especially when being right is costing you lots of money. And if you had been holding that stock for a month and it had lost ten percent of it's value, then it's probably rocketing towards bankruptcy. After all, if it loses ten percent every month for ten months?
Rule number two of trading is to remove emotions. It's hard not to sit there watch, but really, you've got to have method in place and watch it logically. You can really get addicted to stock trading. Remember there are guys that commit suicide over this stuff. You've got to remove your emotions and tear yourself away. It's worse than alcoholism for some.
But you do have to look at it every day. About an hour or two. You have to sit down with you crayons and construction paper and doodle all over. Draw a squiggly line here. Draw a straight line there. Draw an arrow somewhere else. There are websites that do this stuff for you now, but you still have to tell them what you want.
Buy Technical Analysis for Dummies. If you don't trust it you can go to Fool Dot Com, and set up a fictitious portfolio. Then you can see how well it works. Of course, I've got a broker. I kissed that money goodbye a long time ago. (That's why I don't freak out when I lose some.) If I do well then that's okay.
Until tomorrow, remember. This is not a recommendation of any stock, book, or trading method. You should consult your friends, family, and financial advisor before making any decisions. Take that SEC!
I bought a hundred shares at 14.98 last Friday. Today, I sold those hundred shares at 15.48. That's a gain of fifty bucks. Now with my twenty bucks in fees, I made thirty bucks. That may not seem like a lot, but that works out to about a 2 percent return. Not bad for a first try at technical analysis. (It doesn't seem stellar, but it's only been a week.)
It's got to be better than the gambling I've been doing. I've just got to remember the number one rule. Use stops.
I was talking to a guy at work today. I think I am going to tell him about technical analysis and let him consider it for himself. I just asked him for three unrelated stocks. I've printed them off and plan to show him the charts. He actually picked three good looking stocks, but they are too expensive for me. At least they are near to good looking, but close only counts in horse shoes and hand grenades.
He told me about when he bout K-Mart stock he was planning on retiring on it. I told him that I had bought some as well. I only bought a hundred shares and the next trading day they declared bankruptcy. (Just after a three day weekend.) The price went from the 1.50 I bought it at to 75 cents in one swoop. I was seriously depressed.
He told me that he bought a thousand shares at sixty cents a piece. Now of course, it didn't stay at sixty cents. It went back up to $1.70 a share. He was planning on retiring on those shares. The thing is that I just wanted to double my money.
I sold out at about 90 cents. He never did. Today, he has a thousand pieces of toilet paper. This is why stops are so important. When you buy a stock you say to yourself, "How much am I willing to lose on this deal?"
If you buy a stock at ten dollars and decide you are only willing to lose ten percent, you set a stop loss order at 9 dollars. Essentially, you tell your broker that if it hits nine dollars, you want out. You may actually get to sell it for 8.50, but at least you are out.
It's human nature to want to be right, but remember, this is money people. Sometimes it's okay to be wrong. Especially when being right is costing you lots of money. And if you had been holding that stock for a month and it had lost ten percent of it's value, then it's probably rocketing towards bankruptcy. After all, if it loses ten percent every month for ten months?
Rule number two of trading is to remove emotions. It's hard not to sit there watch, but really, you've got to have method in place and watch it logically. You can really get addicted to stock trading. Remember there are guys that commit suicide over this stuff. You've got to remove your emotions and tear yourself away. It's worse than alcoholism for some.
But you do have to look at it every day. About an hour or two. You have to sit down with you crayons and construction paper and doodle all over. Draw a squiggly line here. Draw a straight line there. Draw an arrow somewhere else. There are websites that do this stuff for you now, but you still have to tell them what you want.
Buy Technical Analysis for Dummies. If you don't trust it you can go to Fool Dot Com, and set up a fictitious portfolio. Then you can see how well it works. Of course, I've got a broker. I kissed that money goodbye a long time ago. (That's why I don't freak out when I lose some.) If I do well then that's okay.
Until tomorrow, remember. This is not a recommendation of any stock, book, or trading method. You should consult your friends, family, and financial advisor before making any decisions. Take that SEC!
Thursday, May 27, 2004
Hey! I've spent all day getting ready for Oregon next week. That's right next week, I'll be bound for Coos Bay! It promises to be exciting. I've never been west of San Antonio. And for those of you curious, no, I do not take all my vacations with MeMa. (Some one at work actually asked me this.)
I do have some news. There is an official Hitchhiker site. What's Hitchhiker?
I do have some news. There is an official Hitchhiker site. What's Hitchhiker?
Wednesday, May 26, 2004
Hey folks! Just got back from seeing Shrek II. It's a pretty good movie if you don't mind the fact that it's the same plot as the last movie. Well, not plot exactly. I mean the moral is the same. It's the just be who you are moral. My favorite line from the movie was "Hey good looking, we'll be back to pick you up later."
There were great references to The Lord Of The Rings, Frankenstein, and The Seven Year Itch, but I never saw one reference Star Wars. What's up? Did I miss it? I was actually shocked. If somebody has seen Shrek II and noticed one, please let me know. After all, there has to be one. There was a reference in the first two.
There were great references to The Lord Of The Rings, Frankenstein, and The Seven Year Itch, but I never saw one reference Star Wars. What's up? Did I miss it? I was actually shocked. If somebody has seen Shrek II and noticed one, please let me know. After all, there has to be one. There was a reference in the first two.
Tuesday, May 25, 2004
LISTEN UP |\|0085!! I+'5 +!/\/\3 4 HAMLET N 733+ 5P34K. (If you have no idea what 733T speak is, then just click the link. I promise it's entertaining. If you can handle a couple of curse words.) SH4K35P34R3 S |\|0\/\/ PWNED!!!1!! LMAO!! (Tomorrow I promise to return to normal.)
Monday, May 24, 2004
I had an unusual event happen last night. Some one said to me...
"Did you know they are putting comic books on CD? I like that cause I like comic books, but get bored with reading."
What? Don't like reading? How can you not like reading? The first thing I thought of was the Andy Griffith Show. Even Goober liked reading and he was a...
...well...a goober.
And that's where I have the problem with teaching people the computer. Most of them don't want to read. What else is a computer besides something to read things on. Sure now days, you get things like Flash, MP3s, and JavaScript, but core of the internet is reading. I've been on the internet for a long time. I first got on the internet back in 1990, and I thought, "Gee this thing is cool. It'll be great if they could get more stuff on it and speed it up."
Then I got back on in 1994. There was a world of difference. The whole thing had sped up, but it also had been dumbed down a bit. The trend on the internet has not been one to get more reading on the internet. Now days, whole sites run off of simply decoration.
Why does Spam need a website? Sure at least Spam does something with their site. They sell t-shirts and hats. Papa John's allows you to order a pizza, but what's the point of this?
And that's what breaks my heart about the internet. My brother once spent an hour downloading software that made chat rooms that you could chat in. You know just talk. Like with a microphone and your voice. No, it doesn't turn it to text, we're talking about streaming audio here folks. (I guess it was streaming audio. You'd have to pester him to find out how it worked.) He spent an hour doing this, and he has a cable modem. That's forever. What did he find? A discussion on science? Religion? Politics? No, what he found was room of fifteen people saying "Whazzzzup!" repeatedly. He shut the program down and never ran it again.
That is what has happened all over the internet. I like a little eye candy as much as anybody, but to truly enjoy the internet you need to use it for it's purpose. Mass communication. A Sharing of ideas. Remember this stuff folks? Were turning perfectly respectable things like Blogs into just another way to see boobies.
Not that I mind boobies. But I also like to read about the person behind the boobies. Is that second site pornographic? Probably, but that doesn't make it repulsive in my mind. It's interesting to see what movie she saw. You still get cool posts that say,
Get to the point Gunny your wandering again.
I know. I've been fought the urge three or five times already this post.
The thing is I've been having some problems at work. The fact that I enjoy reading is because I am such a quiet person. There are a lot of folks that I work with that have to pop. All the time. And their world has to pop as well. And it's distracting me from my work. I think that I am going to start wearing earplugs.
But that makes me anti-social and rude. Which only causes more problems at work.
The problem is that it gets louder and louder, because these people need to make more noise to hear themselves. Which is also kind of selfish. (The key word there is also. Because it's also viewed a bit selfish to want to exclude them from mine. Not that I want anyone excluded.)
But I can take comfort in the fact that I am not alone in this. How many of you are sitting there right now with TV off concentrating on this post. Take refuge in this, recluses. We may not congregate, but we do exist, and if the internet is any kind of indicator, we are very powerful. Because we think. We read. We explore new things. We do not need a world that is always entertaining. We some times make a world that entertains us. We often times invent the pops in the world.
Just don't forget. There's a whole big world out there. And if you plan to head out into it, say to go to Wal-Mart or get a bite to eat. You should probably take a shower if you haven't today, cause there are other people there, and they won't hesitate to point it out. Loudly. Repeatedly.
I'm sure there was point to this post. It just eludes me now what it was. This is another problem with being an introvert. I have a hard time getting thoughts to other people.
"Did you know they are putting comic books on CD? I like that cause I like comic books, but get bored with reading."
What? Don't like reading? How can you not like reading? The first thing I thought of was the Andy Griffith Show. Even Goober liked reading and he was a...
...well...a goober.
And that's where I have the problem with teaching people the computer. Most of them don't want to read. What else is a computer besides something to read things on. Sure now days, you get things like Flash, MP3s, and JavaScript, but core of the internet is reading. I've been on the internet for a long time. I first got on the internet back in 1990, and I thought, "Gee this thing is cool. It'll be great if they could get more stuff on it and speed it up."
Then I got back on in 1994. There was a world of difference. The whole thing had sped up, but it also had been dumbed down a bit. The trend on the internet has not been one to get more reading on the internet. Now days, whole sites run off of simply decoration.
Why does Spam need a website? Sure at least Spam does something with their site. They sell t-shirts and hats. Papa John's allows you to order a pizza, but what's the point of this?
And that's what breaks my heart about the internet. My brother once spent an hour downloading software that made chat rooms that you could chat in. You know just talk. Like with a microphone and your voice. No, it doesn't turn it to text, we're talking about streaming audio here folks. (I guess it was streaming audio. You'd have to pester him to find out how it worked.) He spent an hour doing this, and he has a cable modem. That's forever. What did he find? A discussion on science? Religion? Politics? No, what he found was room of fifteen people saying "Whazzzzup!" repeatedly. He shut the program down and never ran it again.
That is what has happened all over the internet. I like a little eye candy as much as anybody, but to truly enjoy the internet you need to use it for it's purpose. Mass communication. A Sharing of ideas. Remember this stuff folks? Were turning perfectly respectable things like Blogs into just another way to see boobies.
Not that I mind boobies. But I also like to read about the person behind the boobies. Is that second site pornographic? Probably, but that doesn't make it repulsive in my mind. It's interesting to see what movie she saw. You still get cool posts that say,
"Now I am back at my machine, looking over my scattered and jumbled files again, with no good excuse not to do some proper work. The box has had its spring cleaning. Presumably inspiration will follow. (So long as you understand I take 'inspiration' to mean 'browsing and possibly buying things I really have no use for, online')"
Get to the point Gunny your wandering again.
I know. I've been fought the urge three or five times already this post.
The thing is I've been having some problems at work. The fact that I enjoy reading is because I am such a quiet person. There are a lot of folks that I work with that have to pop. All the time. And their world has to pop as well. And it's distracting me from my work. I think that I am going to start wearing earplugs.
But that makes me anti-social and rude. Which only causes more problems at work.
The problem is that it gets louder and louder, because these people need to make more noise to hear themselves. Which is also kind of selfish. (The key word there is also. Because it's also viewed a bit selfish to want to exclude them from mine. Not that I want anyone excluded.)
But I can take comfort in the fact that I am not alone in this. How many of you are sitting there right now with TV off concentrating on this post. Take refuge in this, recluses. We may not congregate, but we do exist, and if the internet is any kind of indicator, we are very powerful. Because we think. We read. We explore new things. We do not need a world that is always entertaining. We some times make a world that entertains us. We often times invent the pops in the world.
Just don't forget. There's a whole big world out there. And if you plan to head out into it, say to go to Wal-Mart or get a bite to eat. You should probably take a shower if you haven't today, cause there are other people there, and they won't hesitate to point it out. Loudly. Repeatedly.
I'm sure there was point to this post. It just eludes me now what it was. This is another problem with being an introvert. I have a hard time getting thoughts to other people.
Sunday, May 23, 2004
My friend Ken is hilarious. He had a whole conversation with a girl named Barbie the other night.
Ken: Hey, you dyed your hair.
Barbie: Yeah.
Ken: I mean it was dyed before, but you re-dyed it.
Barbie: Yeah.
Ken: I kind of liked the way it looked before. You know where it was brown and then turned blond.
Ken has no idea what it means to be embarrassed. He also has no idea what "roots showing" means either. He likes his women just a little on the trashy side. He's a dirty old man in training. He's actually just as bad as our resident dirty old man, Sturgeon, but Ken's only half the age. I guess that's what comes in today's fast paced society. We're so efficient, we turn out ODB's in half the time.
Ken: Hey, you dyed your hair.
Barbie: Yeah.
Ken: I mean it was dyed before, but you re-dyed it.
Barbie: Yeah.
Ken: I kind of liked the way it looked before. You know where it was brown and then turned blond.
Ken has no idea what it means to be embarrassed. He also has no idea what "roots showing" means either. He likes his women just a little on the trashy side. He's a dirty old man in training. He's actually just as bad as our resident dirty old man, Sturgeon, but Ken's only half the age. I guess that's what comes in today's fast paced society. We're so efficient, we turn out ODB's in half the time.
Saturday, May 22, 2004
You know I hit the treadmill this morning and while I was walking, I decided to check my pulse. There's this little doodad on the treadmill with two little metal strips. If you push your thumb against it, it tells your pulse. My pulse this morning? 43. Shouldn't I be dead? I don't think that the doodad is working properly. I can't imagine that I am walking 3.5 miles an hour and barely ticking over the tach.
Have you seen the site for Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy? That's right there's a movie coming up. Of course, it'll upset a lot of people, stray from the original plot, and pretty much star all the wrong actors. Of course, I for one am looking forward to the movie. I wish it would have happened while DNA was alive.
Have you seen the site for Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy? That's right there's a movie coming up. Of course, it'll upset a lot of people, stray from the original plot, and pretty much star all the wrong actors. Of course, I for one am looking forward to the movie. I wish it would have happened while DNA was alive.
Thursday, May 20, 2004
Donald Trump is amazing, but he's not nearly as amazing as those that idolize him. He's symbolic of what's wrong with people today. He's got personal aircraft with gold fixtures, giant pieces of real estate with his name plastered on it, and a reality TV show. Much like his hair style, Trump is nothing poorly covered with a thin veil of machismo.
Take his show for example. One of his contestants claim that he built a multi-million dollar cigar empire. Actually it's a $425,000 dollar
cigar empire. This guy is just perfect for Trump. It took him eight years to make it worth that much. In the one year of working for Donald Trump, he'll make 250K.
What about his casinos? They just posted a loss of $1.63 a share. For those of you that have no idea what that means. It means that for every share of stock you can deduct that much from the price. What is the price of the stock? DJT is currently about $1.90 a share. That means it's worth about 37 cents a share. Of course that loss occured over a quarter. That means that they have three more periods this year to lose money like that.
Of course this is while he meets wife number three, Melania Knauss. Thats right. Third times a charm.
The thing is that it amazes me how many people idolize this man. His glitz and glamour are his greatest hindrances to becoming wealthier than Bill Gates. These are also the same type of people go to casinos. Of course, I think that the lottery is a tax on people bad at math. Oh, I voted for it but will never play it.
The ironic thing is that the people who idol's Trump are the same people who stare blankly when you ask about Buffet. Or even worse, they ask if you mean Jimmy Buffet.
Don't get me wrong the guy is worth 2.5 Billion. Of course the guy that invented Beanie Babies is worth twice that much. That's right folks, Beanie Babies.
Of course, the Trump does have a book, if you care to read it.
Take his show for example. One of his contestants claim that he built a multi-million dollar cigar empire. Actually it's a $425,000 dollar
cigar empire. This guy is just perfect for Trump. It took him eight years to make it worth that much. In the one year of working for Donald Trump, he'll make 250K.
What about his casinos? They just posted a loss of $1.63 a share. For those of you that have no idea what that means. It means that for every share of stock you can deduct that much from the price. What is the price of the stock? DJT is currently about $1.90 a share. That means it's worth about 37 cents a share. Of course that loss occured over a quarter. That means that they have three more periods this year to lose money like that.
Of course this is while he meets wife number three, Melania Knauss. Thats right. Third times a charm.
The thing is that it amazes me how many people idolize this man. His glitz and glamour are his greatest hindrances to becoming wealthier than Bill Gates. These are also the same type of people go to casinos. Of course, I think that the lottery is a tax on people bad at math. Oh, I voted for it but will never play it.
The ironic thing is that the people who idol's Trump are the same people who stare blankly when you ask about Buffet. Or even worse, they ask if you mean Jimmy Buffet.
Don't get me wrong the guy is worth 2.5 Billion. Of course the guy that invented Beanie Babies is worth twice that much. That's right folks, Beanie Babies.
Of course, the Trump does have a book, if you care to read it.
Wednesday, May 19, 2004
Unconventional Wisdom...
When looking out for number one, try not to step in number two.
Remember kids, half of you are below average.
Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco.
Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.
There are 2 theories to arguing with a woman...neither works.
Never miss a good chance to shut up.
Always drink upstream from the herd.
The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back in your pocket.
There are three kinds of men: The ones that learn by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric Farkfence and find out for themselves.
Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back.
The river only runs as fast as the slowest boat.
Don't sweat the petty stuff.
Don't pet the sweaty stuff.
When looking out for number one, try not to step in number two.
Remember kids, half of you are below average.
Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco.
Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.
There are 2 theories to arguing with a woman...neither works.
Never miss a good chance to shut up.
Always drink upstream from the herd.
The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back in your pocket.
There are three kinds of men: The ones that learn by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric Farkfence and find out for themselves.
Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back.
The river only runs as fast as the slowest boat.
Don't sweat the petty stuff.
Don't pet the sweaty stuff.
Sunday, May 16, 2004
A new joke and I thought it up all by myself. Here it is, cause I am such a classy guy. I told it the other night at work to James and Ken.
Me: Hey do you guys know what the second major green house gas is?
James: um, methane?
Me: *poot*
That's right folks! Crude and educational. How often do you get that? (I was inspired by, "What's green and goes over a hundred miles an hour backwards.) I'm here all week, folks. Try the veal.
Me: Hey do you guys know what the second major green house gas is?
James: um, methane?
Me: *poot*
That's right folks! Crude and educational. How often do you get that? (I was inspired by, "What's green and goes over a hundred miles an hour backwards.) I'm here all week, folks. Try the veal.
Friday, May 14, 2004
Thoughts from the Exxon on Church Street...
Gas has gotten expensive. Please somebody explain to me why we aren't exploring Alaska? I mean, it gets pretty freaking cold there. It's expensive to do so. Why did we buy it from Russia anyway? We need to start using it, or sell it to Canada.
I'm glad that somebody thought up to put the paper in front of urinals. It's nice to have something to look at besides graffiti. Does it always have to be the sports page. I know I am in the minority, but surely your average fella has other interests than sports. I really have no interest in sports so this just annoys me a lot. Sometimes it's nice to see a urinal that has the front page, but they probably place that in the women's.
The bathroom isn't that great looking at the Exxon on Church Street. I know that Exxon claims that they are for the "driver human", but they aren't much for the "whizzer human." I'm glad I'm a guy and don't actually have to touch anything. Well, except myself. (Those last three words were not an invitation to make jokes at my expense.)
Today, made my third trip to Nashville this week. That one guy chickened out Wednesday. I went to meet the other guy Thursday. I had to go today to pay for it, since I couldn't get a receipt yesterday. The boss had to wait on the book keeper.
The one thing that excites me about gas stations? When they charge one price for all sizes of fountain drinks. There's something satisfying about getting a jumbo 72 ounce drink for 59 cents. Of course, the cup and lid probably costs them a nickel which is more than the coke costs. The most expensive thing is probably those extra long straws. I'm so glad to not be diabetic or to have acid reflux or IBS. I couldn't eat if I had to eat healthy. It's hard enough swearing off beef. (I'm calling myself a Bovitarian)
Is everybody selling Krispy Kreme doughnuts? Gas Stations, Wal-marts, et cetera. They are twice the price of Wal-mart doughnuts. Sure they taste better than Wally World's doughnuts, but is twice the price worth it. They aren't even hot. The only reason to go out of my way is to get a hot doughnut. Some might say I am too lazy to do something as simple as put them in the microwave. Well, I'm not. I'm too lazy to go get them at all. See, I save myself four bucks. (four bucks?!?! What are they made of? Gas?)
Gas has gotten expensive. Please somebody explain to me why we aren't exploring Alaska? I mean, it gets pretty freaking cold there. It's expensive to do so. Why did we buy it from Russia anyway? We need to start using it, or sell it to Canada.
I'm glad that somebody thought up to put the paper in front of urinals. It's nice to have something to look at besides graffiti. Does it always have to be the sports page. I know I am in the minority, but surely your average fella has other interests than sports. I really have no interest in sports so this just annoys me a lot. Sometimes it's nice to see a urinal that has the front page, but they probably place that in the women's.
The bathroom isn't that great looking at the Exxon on Church Street. I know that Exxon claims that they are for the "driver human", but they aren't much for the "whizzer human." I'm glad I'm a guy and don't actually have to touch anything. Well, except myself. (Those last three words were not an invitation to make jokes at my expense.)
Today, made my third trip to Nashville this week. That one guy chickened out Wednesday. I went to meet the other guy Thursday. I had to go today to pay for it, since I couldn't get a receipt yesterday. The boss had to wait on the book keeper.
The one thing that excites me about gas stations? When they charge one price for all sizes of fountain drinks. There's something satisfying about getting a jumbo 72 ounce drink for 59 cents. Of course, the cup and lid probably costs them a nickel which is more than the coke costs. The most expensive thing is probably those extra long straws. I'm so glad to not be diabetic or to have acid reflux or IBS. I couldn't eat if I had to eat healthy. It's hard enough swearing off beef. (I'm calling myself a Bovitarian)
Is everybody selling Krispy Kreme doughnuts? Gas Stations, Wal-marts, et cetera. They are twice the price of Wal-mart doughnuts. Sure they taste better than Wally World's doughnuts, but is twice the price worth it. They aren't even hot. The only reason to go out of my way is to get a hot doughnut. Some might say I am too lazy to do something as simple as put them in the microwave. Well, I'm not. I'm too lazy to go get them at all. See, I save myself four bucks. (four bucks?!?! What are they made of? Gas?)
Wednesday, May 12, 2004
You know it's frustrating when people on who wants to be a miss the easy questions. Name the 1970's rock band that also shares it's name with a mythological river. It frustrating that I name it before give the choices. This from the fellow that won the race to list four European cities from north to south.
So the property that I bought at the tax auction has two mattresses, a box springs, chest of drawers, and a couch in the yard. I called somebody to see if they could pick it up. I was late meeting him due to traffic on 24. The thing is that he showed up. He saw some people gathering nearby and freaked out. He left. When I showed up more than thirty minutes late. I turned around and headed back home.
Then I called the company to explain what happened. A lady answered the phone. She said that she would relay the message. That was three o'clock. I called back at five thirty. The same lady answered the phone and then handed the phone to the man. I assume that this was his wife.
He explained to me about the "gang" that was gathering as waited for me. Then he told me that he really was uncomfortable going back. I told him I understood. I know it's the 'hood. The problem is that he should have known that as well.
If you're in Nashville and don't know that anything near Dickerson Pike is shady, consider this your warning. The thing is he knew the neighborhood. He knew enough to know that he would be coming from Trinity Blvd. He knew that Dickerson Road shares some of the same space with First Street, but some how he didn't realize that this wasn't as nice as a place as Brentwood.
Brentwood wouldn't allow stuff like that. This guy delivers open top dumpsters to residential properties. What was he expecting? You don't deliver those things and pick up mattresses out of the yard in posh neighborhoods. Sounds like some one is in the wrong business.
So I guess I get to find some one else tomorrow.
I've got more news, but that's enough for now. Good night folks.
So the property that I bought at the tax auction has two mattresses, a box springs, chest of drawers, and a couch in the yard. I called somebody to see if they could pick it up. I was late meeting him due to traffic on 24. The thing is that he showed up. He saw some people gathering nearby and freaked out. He left. When I showed up more than thirty minutes late. I turned around and headed back home.
Then I called the company to explain what happened. A lady answered the phone. She said that she would relay the message. That was three o'clock. I called back at five thirty. The same lady answered the phone and then handed the phone to the man. I assume that this was his wife.
He explained to me about the "gang" that was gathering as waited for me. Then he told me that he really was uncomfortable going back. I told him I understood. I know it's the 'hood. The problem is that he should have known that as well.
If you're in Nashville and don't know that anything near Dickerson Pike is shady, consider this your warning. The thing is he knew the neighborhood. He knew enough to know that he would be coming from Trinity Blvd. He knew that Dickerson Road shares some of the same space with First Street, but some how he didn't realize that this wasn't as nice as a place as Brentwood.
Brentwood wouldn't allow stuff like that. This guy delivers open top dumpsters to residential properties. What was he expecting? You don't deliver those things and pick up mattresses out of the yard in posh neighborhoods. Sounds like some one is in the wrong business.
So I guess I get to find some one else tomorrow.
I've got more news, but that's enough for now. Good night folks.
Monday, May 10, 2004
The stupid song that is playing is the one that Big Stupid Tommy wants everyone to hear. Share and Enjoy.
(bgsound src="http://www.hohmsen.de/sounds/drogenlied.mp3" loop=5)
I've killed this song by request.
(bgsound src="http://www.hohmsen.de/sounds/drogenlied.mp3" loop=5)
I've killed this song by request.
Darn Blogger. How dare they go down without my permission. Routine maintenance is just a farce.
Anyway, I was going to post something witty yesterday. It was the text from a 5th wave cartoon.
Defining your investment risk with the:
Low Risk: Waits for toast to pop up even though the toast is burning.
Moderate Risk: Goes after toast with wooden toast prongs.
High Risk: Goes after toast with all metal butter knife.
Ultra High Risk: Goes after toast with metal butter knife wearing a wet swim suit and a stainless steel colander on head.
I'm sorry, that I can't post the image. Remember that this has been reprinted without permission. Of anyone. That joke is the sole property of Rich Tennant, creator of The 5th Wave. Buy his book.
This is not a recommendation to buy any security, toaster, colander, or all metal butter knife. Consult your own interior decorator. Ha! Take that SEC!
Audi
Anyway, I was going to post something witty yesterday. It was the text from a 5th wave cartoon.
Defining your investment risk with the:
Toast Retrieving Risk Tolerance Test
Low Risk: Waits for toast to pop up even though the toast is burning.
Moderate Risk: Goes after toast with wooden toast prongs.
High Risk: Goes after toast with all metal butter knife.
Ultra High Risk: Goes after toast with metal butter knife wearing a wet swim suit and a stainless steel colander on head.
I'm sorry, that I can't post the image. Remember that this has been reprinted without permission. Of anyone. That joke is the sole property of Rich Tennant, creator of The 5th Wave. Buy his book.
This is not a recommendation to buy any security, toaster, colander, or all metal butter knife. Consult your own interior decorator. Ha! Take that SEC!
Audi
Saturday, May 08, 2004
You know what that Andrew Jackson was one tough son of a gun. Turns out that he was shot in a duel in 1806. The wound bothered him until his death in 1845. Read here. (start with the eighth paragraph.) I would have hated to meet Andrew Jackson in a dark alley.
After several years of wondering, I finally heard the joke from Men In Black. All I knew is that it ended with, "Honey, this one's eating my popcorn."
I don't even know what's wrong with Big Stupid Tommy. He's listed a website as his new favorite site. Now I can't see. Blog ends now. Maybe I'll remember tomorrow, what I was going to write today.
Dang that Tommy!
After several years of wondering, I finally heard the joke from Men In Black. All I knew is that it ended with, "Honey, this one's eating my popcorn."
I don't even know what's wrong with Big Stupid Tommy. He's listed a website as his new favorite site. Now I can't see. Blog ends now. Maybe I'll remember tomorrow, what I was going to write today.
Dang that Tommy!
Friday, May 07, 2004
Today's classic comedy comes from The Three Stooges.
Larry, Moe, and Shemp are about their daily duties at Pip Boys Tailor Shop. Enter lady. Stooges run to counter.
Shemp: Yes, Ma'am?
Lady: Uh, do you dye?
Moe: No, that's his natural expression.
Larry: What can we do for you?
Lady: I'd like to have this dress dyed.
Moe: What color?
Lady: Henna color.
Shemp: You mean henna color at all?
Lady: No, H-E-N-N-A. Henna. Kind of a brown reddish.
Shemp: I never ate a brown reddish.
This has been a scene from Sing A Song Of Six Pants.
Larry, Moe, and Shemp are about their daily duties at Pip Boys Tailor Shop. Enter lady. Stooges run to counter.
Shemp: Yes, Ma'am?
Lady: Uh, do you dye?
Moe: No, that's his natural expression.
Larry: What can we do for you?
Lady: I'd like to have this dress dyed.
Moe: What color?
Lady: Henna color.
Shemp: You mean henna color at all?
Lady: No, H-E-N-N-A. Henna. Kind of a brown reddish.
Shemp: I never ate a brown reddish.
This has been a scene from Sing A Song Of Six Pants.
Wednesday, May 05, 2004
Today is Cinco De Mayo. Contrary to popular belief, it is not the day of Mexican independence. That's September 15th. Back in 1862, France invaded Mexico due to the fact that it had quit making payments on money that France loaned them. England and Spain withdrew any support when they realized France's intent. America couldn't help due to the fact of it's own civil war.
France placed Archduke Maximilian of Austria as ruler of Mexico. France's troops landed on the coast at the Gulf of Mexico. On May 5th, they faced great resistance at forts Loreto and Guadalupe. The 6,500 French troops were stopped by 4,500 Mexicans.
Upon the news, Napoleon sent more troops to Mexico. After a year Napoleon had sent 30,000 troops and actually did capture Mexico. Maximilian ruled from 1864-1867.
The downfall came when America started to give support to the Mexicans after the American Civil war had ended.
Now go drink some tequila.
France placed Archduke Maximilian of Austria as ruler of Mexico. France's troops landed on the coast at the Gulf of Mexico. On May 5th, they faced great resistance at forts Loreto and Guadalupe. The 6,500 French troops were stopped by 4,500 Mexicans.
Upon the news, Napoleon sent more troops to Mexico. After a year Napoleon had sent 30,000 troops and actually did capture Mexico. Maximilian ruled from 1864-1867.
The downfall came when America started to give support to the Mexicans after the American Civil war had ended.
Now go drink some tequila.
Monday, May 03, 2004
So, I've bought a stock to replace Marvel. It's Applebee's. It seems that more people have been eating good in the neighborhood. Do your own research. This is not a recommendation to buy.
I helped a guy a move yesterday. It's scary. He had two bedrooms worth of toys. He was moving empty boxes. He was all over the board as well. He had Power Rangers, Ah! My Goddess, and just about anything else animated. We found posters for Transformers, Treasure Planet, and Sailor Moon. It's scary somebody REALLY needs a girlfriend. I found some boxes that said "city" on them. They told me that he had several "cities."
You know I went crazy when the Star Wars Legos came out. I went and bought them all. Then a new wave came out less than six months later. I said, "This is crazy. I must have spent near a thousand dollars last time. If they continue to do this, I'll go broke." That's when I quit buying Star Wars legos. Screw it. I've got better things to do with my money.
Not that I don't have my weaknesses. I eat at Taco Bell two or three times a week.
Laugh of the day. Go to Tommy's site and see what word he has worked into the sidebar. On a side note, I've got friends that have never met him, but still call him Big Stupid Tommy. It's as if it were his real name.
Thanks for reading folks. I've got to go to Home Depot for some wood to put over the windows and doors of the crack house. And a big ol' drill. And freaking large bolts. And probably a giant scary "No Tresspassing" sign.
I helped a guy a move yesterday. It's scary. He had two bedrooms worth of toys. He was moving empty boxes. He was all over the board as well. He had Power Rangers, Ah! My Goddess, and just about anything else animated. We found posters for Transformers, Treasure Planet, and Sailor Moon. It's scary somebody REALLY needs a girlfriend. I found some boxes that said "city" on them. They told me that he had several "cities."
You know I went crazy when the Star Wars Legos came out. I went and bought them all. Then a new wave came out less than six months later. I said, "This is crazy. I must have spent near a thousand dollars last time. If they continue to do this, I'll go broke." That's when I quit buying Star Wars legos. Screw it. I've got better things to do with my money.
Not that I don't have my weaknesses. I eat at Taco Bell two or three times a week.
Laugh of the day. Go to Tommy's site and see what word he has worked into the sidebar. On a side note, I've got friends that have never met him, but still call him Big Stupid Tommy. It's as if it were his real name.
Thanks for reading folks. I've got to go to Home Depot for some wood to put over the windows and doors of the crack house. And a big ol' drill. And freaking large bolts. And probably a giant scary "No Tresspassing" sign.
Saturday, May 01, 2004
Oldsmobile has quit making vehicles. The last one rolled off Thursday. Oldsmobile was created in 1897 and the last Alero rolled off the line last Thursday. The thing strange about it was the fact that the workers were cheering. Here it is the ending of an era and they were cheering. Of course, they will be making other GM vehicles. Of course, classic vehicles do sometimes make a comeback. Look at Bugatti. It's currently slated for production by the VW Audi group. (Warning: Bugatti site is flash intensive.)
| I picked up Big Fish the other day. Everyone should pick it up. It's a great father and son tale. The father has told tall tales all his life but is dying of cancer. The movie is about his son is trying to figure out exactly who his father is. Also, next Tuesday, Peter Pan comes out. Sure it's a kids movie, and you already know the plot, but it's really well done. Great special effects and actually some insight into the story. They actually show what keeps Peter young. They've updated the location of Neverland for the space age. I promise its good. And the mermaids are scary. I don't want to hear any crap over this one. Sit down and watch it. I promise you will enjoy it. |
