Monday, December 27, 2004
Read today on Fark, 2004's worst gadgets. It's a pretty interesting list and inspired me to compile my personal list of worst gadgets. (Well, not just gadgets. Just junk that I've gotten or purchased.)
My very fist DVD. It was The Terminator. I was so excited. I couldn't wait to test it out on my new DVD-Rom. I love new technology. When I tried out the DVD there was a menu option that was labeled "About The Sound." I tried it and it said, "As not to interfere with the director's original intent, this movie has been released in it's original monophonic sound." I swear I remember the exact phrase to this day. Five years later. I had to break it down. Mono means one. Phonic means...
"What?!?!?! It's not even in stereo." Ghostbusters was released the same year and it was in stereo, and it is a comedy. Of course, I calmed down after a couple of years and came to realize that Ghostbusters was a major Hollywood production. James Cameron still had long time before he didn't have to shoot on a shoe string budget. But still, it's a new medium. You think they could have thrown something in. Fortunately, my second DVD still remains as my favorite.
Another sill gadget that I bought was my first DVD-Rom. I bought it back in 1999. It never did work right. I got sound but never could see anything. Of course, I eventually bought a DVD player and watched Walking with Dinosaurs for weeks on end.
On my eighth birthday, I had a birthday party at Chuck E Cheeses. I got many presents that I had no idea what they were. The main one I remember was a HeMan. I didn't even know what HeMan was. I never have cared much for HeMan. Of course, the craziest present that I got that day was a Barbie Corvette. With a bit of ingenuity, I taped all my broken G. I. Joe bits on it, strapped in Lady Jane and Cover Girl, and rolled over some Cobra agents. It was my hot pink Corvette of death.
The TI calculator that I bought in high school seems kind of silly now that I think about it. Did I ever use it after high school? Did I ever use it for anything besides trying to create cool patterns with parabolas and hyperboles? Why wasn't it that I could never make a circle? I think that my most common equation was X=Y. And it was cool for entering things a little more complex than 66045508. I could type cool things now like 3ATM3.
That stupid singing dog that I got for Christmas a couple of years ago. It croons out some silly song. I was tired of it in three seconds.
Every watch I've ever bought. I tend lose watches within the first three months that I've bought them. My schedule changed at Wal-Mart for a couple of weeks and I know that I if I didn't have a watch I would be screwed. When my schedule resumed back to normal, I just gave that watch away. That was the last watch I bought. I know I would never need it again. At least not before the batteries ran out.
Coal-powered socks. I kept trying to stoke the fires hotter. I burnt my skin three times before I eventually burnt the socks one morning before I put them on. I'm not even sure why I thought these things up. I'm sure that I would have been sued by some one related to Ben Franklin for attaching his name to these. Plus the exhaust turned all my underwear black.
My Lego lamp. One day it's my dream to have all my furniture made of Legos. Need to change your bed from a queen to king? Break it apart and add more Legos. Out of drawer space? Add more drawers. Unfortunately, my furniture collection never got any further than a single lamp. It was big, bulky, and really not that cool looking. If I ever get rich enough, I may still try this, but nothings got to hurt worse that stubbing your to on the sharp, plastic edge of your bed. Of course for a color blind guy like me, knowing that you only have basic colors to match is a dream come true.
Of course, it's up to you to figure out if any of this stuff is true.
Maybe one of these days, I'll list the coolest gadgets I ever had. Of course, by the time I do that. Those gadgets may make the worst gadgets list. All I know is that list will contain something to do with Legos.
My very fist DVD. It was The Terminator. I was so excited. I couldn't wait to test it out on my new DVD-Rom. I love new technology. When I tried out the DVD there was a menu option that was labeled "About The Sound." I tried it and it said, "As not to interfere with the director's original intent, this movie has been released in it's original monophonic sound." I swear I remember the exact phrase to this day. Five years later. I had to break it down. Mono means one. Phonic means...
"What?!?!?! It's not even in stereo." Ghostbusters was released the same year and it was in stereo, and it is a comedy. Of course, I calmed down after a couple of years and came to realize that Ghostbusters was a major Hollywood production. James Cameron still had long time before he didn't have to shoot on a shoe string budget. But still, it's a new medium. You think they could have thrown something in. Fortunately, my second DVD still remains as my favorite.
Another sill gadget that I bought was my first DVD-Rom. I bought it back in 1999. It never did work right. I got sound but never could see anything. Of course, I eventually bought a DVD player and watched Walking with Dinosaurs for weeks on end.
On my eighth birthday, I had a birthday party at Chuck E Cheeses. I got many presents that I had no idea what they were. The main one I remember was a HeMan. I didn't even know what HeMan was. I never have cared much for HeMan. Of course, the craziest present that I got that day was a Barbie Corvette. With a bit of ingenuity, I taped all my broken G. I. Joe bits on it, strapped in Lady Jane and Cover Girl, and rolled over some Cobra agents. It was my hot pink Corvette of death.
The TI calculator that I bought in high school seems kind of silly now that I think about it. Did I ever use it after high school? Did I ever use it for anything besides trying to create cool patterns with parabolas and hyperboles? Why wasn't it that I could never make a circle? I think that my most common equation was X=Y. And it was cool for entering things a little more complex than 66045508. I could type cool things now like 3ATM3.
That stupid singing dog that I got for Christmas a couple of years ago. It croons out some silly song. I was tired of it in three seconds.
Every watch I've ever bought. I tend lose watches within the first three months that I've bought them. My schedule changed at Wal-Mart for a couple of weeks and I know that I if I didn't have a watch I would be screwed. When my schedule resumed back to normal, I just gave that watch away. That was the last watch I bought. I know I would never need it again. At least not before the batteries ran out.
Coal-powered socks. I kept trying to stoke the fires hotter. I burnt my skin three times before I eventually burnt the socks one morning before I put them on. I'm not even sure why I thought these things up. I'm sure that I would have been sued by some one related to Ben Franklin for attaching his name to these. Plus the exhaust turned all my underwear black.
My Lego lamp. One day it's my dream to have all my furniture made of Legos. Need to change your bed from a queen to king? Break it apart and add more Legos. Out of drawer space? Add more drawers. Unfortunately, my furniture collection never got any further than a single lamp. It was big, bulky, and really not that cool looking. If I ever get rich enough, I may still try this, but nothings got to hurt worse that stubbing your to on the sharp, plastic edge of your bed. Of course for a color blind guy like me, knowing that you only have basic colors to match is a dream come true.
Of course, it's up to you to figure out if any of this stuff is true.
Maybe one of these days, I'll list the coolest gadgets I ever had. Of course, by the time I do that. Those gadgets may make the worst gadgets list. All I know is that list will contain something to do with Legos.
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